Don't look back
by The-Phanatics
Summary: Hermione's Diary of the 7th year. The truth about her perfect parents and the love she finally finds, from the last person you expect.


**DISCLAIMER:** I don't own the main characters of Harry Potter. I don't own the settings, and I don't own the main idea. I do however own the plot.

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September 1st 

Hogwarts Express

Dear Diary,

Escape. That is the real thing that brought me back to this school I have been thrown into. Escape from the torturous nights of my father's beatings, and my mother's verbal abuse. Two working parents, accepting their daughter's "little problem" as my mother oh-so-encouragingly put it. The day that I got my letter, was one of the worst I had ever had. The moment my father had read it all the way through he yelled.  
"Did you know about this? What are you some kind of freak? A Witch? What the hell did we do wrong? First you are an ungrateful little brat, and now you are a witch! I don't see how your mother and I put up with you Hermione."  
They put on an act in front of everyone, while inside they are awful. They come to pick me up from the train at the end of each school year. We look like the perfect family. You see them laughing, smiling, eager to learn what I have been up to for the past school year. But when we get back to our cozy little house, its hell. It's something of a routine. I go upstairs and unpack, then I come back downstairs to my parents. The first thing they ask is if I am happy that I don't have to stay with them and how many boys I have been with. Accusing me of being the sort of girl I have never been. After I say nobody, my father slaps me across the face and tells me to stop being a lying coward. Then my mother calls me a slut and sends me upstairs, where I am subjected to spending my summer in my room, or working at my parents office, where they put on this charade of the perfect family. If I do not tend to their every whim, and act like I would die for my parents in front of the people at their office, I come home to bruises and broken hearts. All I ever wanted as a child was to have a mother and father that loved me. I was so innocent. Ready to face the world with my parents by my side. From the time I was six years old, I knew I would never have what my little friends had. When I was little I would ask my mother and father,  
"Do you love me?"  
They would reply,  
"We shouldn't have to love you brat."  
I didn't even know what a brat was, but apparently in their eyes I was the true meaning of one. I would go to sleepovers and see my friends' parents give them kisses goodnight. I would ask my parents,  
"Why don't you ever kiss me?"  
They would say back,  
"Why would we show signs of love to the likes of you Hermione."  
I would be puzzled, not knowing what they mean, just knowing that my parents didn't love me. I guess I'll never have that. Even at Hogwarts, no one really cares for me. Harry and Ron use me to get good grades, or to have a scapegoat. And like with my parents, I do whatever they say, hoping that they will accept me. My classmates at school already judge me because of my muggle parents. The Slytherins are unbearable. Malfoy was the worse. But for some reason, even though I used to hate him, I feel some compassion for him. I know what it feels like to have an abusive mother and father. I had witnessed something over the summer that I never thought I would see in my life. First of all, Malfoy and his father were in a Muggle shop. Second of all, his father wasn't acting like the ruler of everyone. He looked vulnerable, while Malfoy looked strong. Lucius Malfoy was king of his domain, but away from his comfort zone, he was a lowly rat that he had to depend on his subjects to live. Malfoy must of said something that his father didn't like, I saw it in his face. As soon as they walked out of the shop, Lucius grabbed Draco by the ear and pulled him into the alley. He started beating him with his cane and uttering words that I don't even dare write down. I winced and burst into tears, remembering the agonizing truth and pain it is to have a parent who didn't love you, who only used you and abused you. I felt for Malfoy, and I realized why he was the way he was. I understand him, much better than anyone else in my life. I looked back at Malfoy lying there on the ground, his evil father laughing. Malfoy was shaking as he got up, and what looked like with all his strength, he struck his father on the face. Lucius buckled down onto the ground and lie there unconscious. I began crying again, not because of what happened to Draco's father, because I couldn't understand why I couldn't do that. I walked away from the site, but I knew someone was following me. I turned around and saw Malfoy behind me. I struggled to stop crying. Malfoy looked at me. His pale gray eyes shone with hurt and despair. I knew those eyes. They were the eyes I had seen every day in the mirror. His silvery blonde hair had lost its sheen and was unkempt and shaggy. I couldn't stop crying, and somehow, he knew. He knew the reason. He embraced me and I could feel his muscular arms around me. I winced at the touch of a man, remembering the awful nights of the beatings of my father. He just held me, and for a second, it felt like time had stopped. The whole world around me no longer existed and it was just Malfoy and me. He whispered,  
"Hermione, it's okay"  
At that moment, he apparated. I haven't seen him since. But this year, I know I will. He is just like me. He is going to be coming to Hogwarts to escape. No one can get him here. No one can get me here.

Love,

Hermione

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**Author's Note:** You like? R&R! I know this could be longer, but I just had an idea and decided to go with it! Tell me what you think, and don't be afraid to give criticism, just don't beat it down okay? Thanks. 


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